I wrote that.. please tell me what you think about it...I'd be grateful?

Weird. I think you should say less about approaching the choc, and focus more on why it gives you pleasure: the look of it and the taste. Cut off fat like "I then took it and then put it in my mouth", and change stuff like "letting my hands get the feel of it". Describe the feeling. You can't just say "get the feel" of a chocolate, it's pointless, you have to say why, and what you feel. And " the choc" and "moaning" is alittle...over the top. Stop talking about Your Actions and put your Senses in the spotlight.